Today felt loooooong. This whole week is feeling long tbh. First full week back at work after christmas, all the decs are down, and everything has lost its sparkle a bit. Add to that a busy day at work and a packed, delayed train on the way back…
I thought the weekend was going to be the tough one, but I was wrong. Today, I really wanted to get home and pour a large glass of red. I never drank to excess in the week, but that first sip was always mega, and that thought has been niggling at me today from about 3pm!
Don’t panic, I didn’t get home and crack open the Rioja, but I did get home, take off my shoes, pour myself a large ‘fake gin’ and tonic, and flop on the sofa. So, no booze, but I still feel like I have failed a little bit.
The whole point of me doing this was to break the habit. Stop that automatic process. If i am just replacing it with something else, am i really achieving that? Purists would argue no. I am settling on a ‘yes, I am getting there’. Let me explain…
So I had my one fake gin, ate my dinner, did a few bits and bobs around the house, and I am now in bed. My alarm is set for 06:10, and i am going to have an amazing, productive, cotton-wool-head free day tomorrow.
If I had reached for the wine, I would’ve had a couple of glasses, remained rooted to the sofa, ate some biscuits, and would probably still be watching the tele. I would start the day with a lower mood, making it harder for me to stay strong tomorrow if the same cravings kick in.
So for now, I think I can probably live with reaching for the fake gin while I settle into this new lifestyle.
One year: No booze, no takeaways 
Well done Spoon! This really does sound like the toughest day yet. Amazing how hard it is to break the habits – but you haven’t broken your commitment so you should be really proud of that : ) xx
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One week and a day in the bag – BOOM! 🔥
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Hi Becks. I’m with you (so far – Day 9)! Not been too much a chore, but I have trips planned for my birthday in March and also visiting friends (and in-laws) before that that usually involve beer and wine and rum. Not sure I’ll go the whole year, but let’s see how we get on. Keith
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Another way to look at it might be that the ‘plonking’ on the sofa, is the bit which really relaxes you, and it just used to be the wine which accompanied it. By doing it with fake gin instead, it might be less that you are ‘not breaking the habit’, but rather seeing which part of the habit is the important part. Much love. Fair seas and following winds. X X A
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The fake gin is better, like those that quit smoking use gum or patches. Drug addicts need medical help often to help stabilise themselves in rehabs. Some can go cold Turkey others need the mental/physical smooth over.
Well done for doing as well as you are and being honest.
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