All change, please.

This year has been full of change for me. I left my extremely comfortable job to take a more challenging one. My toddler is realising exactly which buttons to press to get me going, and i am still not used to getting very little sleep. Probably the most notable change though has been in my outlook, or more specifically, the crushing realisation that I am not a 20 year old anymore. I am in my late 30’s, and my body is already letting me down. I am dreadfully overweight, and it is starting to affect my relationships; not just with my husband and daughter, but friends aswell. I can’t chase my daughter around, I cant sit on the floor and play with her comfortably, I won’t go on beach holidays…. The list goes on. The one thing that has been niggling at me more than anything though, and wont go away, is that I have started to become reliant on alcohol. I count down the minutes until i will be at home, the baby is in bed, and i am sat on the sofa with a glass of red. In that instant when i take the first sip, my whole day evaporates. Its wonderful. Until i wake up, realise i have drunk 2 bottles and my head feels like it’s full of cotton wool. Then eat my own bodyweight in carbs. Its something I want to change. So, i am committing to 2020 without my wine crutch. The entire year wine (well any alcohol) free.